Therapy isn’t about fixing you because you’re not broken.
You don’t need fixing, but you can benefit from holding yourself accountable, building trust and breaking patterns that hold you back. Let’s talk about how therapy can help you do this and lead to a healthier, happier you.
Once you decide to begin therapy, you’ve already taken the first step in exercising accountability because you are making a decision to work on yourself. This doesn’t mean you should feel shame about things you have done or feelings you’re having. But anytime you face challenges in life, it’s important to look within to see if there are things you can change.
Sometimes it’s easy to identify the role that others play in a conflict but not so easy to see your own role. Therapy provides a space where you can reflect on your coping skills, how you respond to life’s ups and downs, how you manage your emotions, and how you engage with others. It starts with you and once you get to know yourself and your core values and beliefs, you are better equipped to deal with the challenges of life and relationships.
You have to take care of yourself before you can take care of anything, or anyone else; and that’s what therapy is, being accountable for and taking care of yourself.
It all starts with building trust. Step one is building a relationship with your therapist. In a past blog we shared some tips on How to Find a Therapist because it is important that you are comfortable with them. Your relationship with your therapist can play a big role in whether or not you see the results you desire. Once you build a relationship with your therapist you can start to work on building trust with other people in your life.
When you have been hurt or let down in your past, you tend to lose trust in others, and building that trust again can be scary. Or maybe you don’t trust yourself or your ability to make good choices. No one in your life will ever be perfect, and neither will you, but you can identify your values and set boundaries so that you can build trust. Therapy can help you build the self-confidence you need to make positive decisions and form healthy relationships.
A big part of therapy is identifying and addressing the patterns that are holding your back. If you are stuck in a negative pattern and keep responding the same way, you will always get the same results. “Therapy can help us see how our thoughts and beliefs shape our responses and experiences. It creates a space where you can be guided to peel back the layers of who you are, revealing truths that may have been hidden or avoided.” (Cobb-Farmer, Brittney [ablackfemaletherapis]. “Therapy Won’t Fix You, but here’s what it can do:” *Instagram, November 7, 2024, www.instagram.com/p/DCFDhGCP6GP/?img_index=12)
There are lots of reasons why people don’t change, or get stuck in patterns. It could be due to lack of resources or support, fear or just lack of awareness of the negative cycle that is bringing them down. As you think about things you struggle with, it may be hard to see a pattern that you need to break away from. Therapy can help you reflect on and assess your past and present struggles in order to shine a light on a pattern that may exist. Taking steps to break those patterns can be hard and take time, but the support you receive in therapy can help you get there and start to see progress.
If you are in therapy, or thinking about beginning therapy, remember that there is nothing “wrong” with you and you do not need to be “fixed”. Therapy provides a space where you can learn about yourself and how to manage your emotions so that you can cope with life’s challenges. It’s a place to build a positive relationship with yourself so that you can establish positive relationships with others and the world around you. If you are ready to get started, contact us.
