Working with human nature, not against it.
Willingness. It is the one thing that determines how successful my clients are in therapy, and ultimately, in their life. Why? Because it is a state of openness. Ultimately, if there is a challenge showing up, it is happening because there is an adjustment needed. A lesson wants to be learned. A shift wants...
Why is dealing with tears so hard sometimes? People apologize for their tears in therapy all the time. They say “I told myself I wasn’t going to cry today”. Or I will see them actively try to stop their tears. And this is IN THERAPY. Where tears are actually part of the expected terrain....
Did you know you are setting boundaries all the time, maybe without even knowing it? In the personal growth world, there is a lot of talk about boundaries. First of all, what are they? Boundaries are a framework around relationship dynamics. They are the rules between people about how they interact with one another....
Therapy is not for “crazy” people. Let’s get that one out of the way. Therapy is for people who want to be proactive about resolving limitations and growing through difficulties. Don’t believe me? Check out this Forbes article. Obviously, people experience different issues and levels of chaos in their lives. Some people have been...
Everyone encounters seemingly impossible situations. These are situations where it really feels like you are powerless. Your hands are tied. Like, no matter what you do, it’s not going to turn out how you want it. Usually those situations carry emotional intensity. And, let’s be honest, that emotional intensity is probably blinding for anyone,...
Do you ever feel like you are doing all the work? Having the SAME discussion all the time and there are no changes? What if I told you that there is a finite amount of emotional space? When you are all over the emotional space of an issue, you might be crowding it. This...
Do you remember the last time you flipped out over something that doesn’t seem like a big deal in retrospect? We all do it sometimes. “Losing it” looks different for different people. For some people it looks like becoming super defensive. It can look like lashing out at someone, shutting down, being destructive or...
Feelings don’t exactly have a good reputation in terms of being accurate, so I know they might be hard to trust. How can you trust your feelings? The best place to start (bear with me for 2 seconds) is by understanding a basic tenet of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. The idea is that thoughts, feelings...
Becoming an adult. Emotional maturity. The freedoms are kind of awesome. But the responsibilities are the ones that make all the “no adulting” memes so popular. How do you know when you turn that corner into becoming an adult on an emotional level? We all know people who we think “should be an adult...
The way human beings experience emotion makes it seem like the feelings are about someone or something else. Like, it would be normal to think or say that your partner made you angry. Right? It might take a couple of mental cartwheels and somersaults to get your head around this. But you will get it. Marshall...