Working with human nature, not against it.
Few people see the abilities, passions, and bright spots of a teenage girl as clearly as her parents. If only everyone else could appreciate them as you do! You’ve watched her grow up and you know all the charming origins of her quirks. Maybe she’s an introvert and always liked a good amount of...
It’s a thing: being too accountable. The concept of being responsible for your actions is a positive and empowering message communicated by good parents, respectable organizations, teachers, mental health professionals, leaders with integrity and many others. And it should be. It is an important skill: to know how to be accountable. Knowing how to...
Children naturally have big and strong emotions. Unlike many of their adult counterparts, they are still learning. They may not know how to regulate their feelings or what to do with them when they come up. This can lead to what we, as parents, may see as “misbehaviors.” It’s important to understand what feeling...
Anger and guilt are similar in the sense that they experientially disclose true boundaries and values. Not just our intellectual constructs of them. That’s the beauty of emotions, they bypass what we “think” or “expect”. To be fair, that can also be the challenge of them. They can show up without any agreement from our thoughts. And,...
Are you feeling like the issues you want help for are on the social black list? Let’s talk about how to work around shame and so you can get help no matter how bad you think it is. Imagine saying the following statement out loud when you walk into your first therapy appointment: “Ok,...
It’s a state. Like stress. Or depression. Anxiety, stress and depression are usually states that wrap around a cluster of emotions, thoughts or beliefs. So what is anxiety? Anxiety is usually an activating state that comes with being over aroused because there are uncomfortable emotions built up. They aren’t getting the chance to process...
Shame is not exactly a feeling. Shame is an experience human beings have—like depression or anxiety. It is also often a numbing agent. This is not a conscious process. You don’t think to yourself: “Oh, I will just feel ashamed in order to numb myself.” If you’ve experienced shame, which you probably have, you...
Emotions are messengers from the internal world. They were designed that way. They are here to help you survive and thrive. Not be a nuisance. When you pay attention to them and keep them clear, you have way more time and energy for the things that are really important to you. That's why I'm...
The physical sensation of disgust, like many unpleasant emotions, can distract from the feeling’s true message because it is not enjoyable to experience. It is, by nature, repellant. The fact is, disgust can be essential to emotional survival and well being, if we are discerning and open to it. Before we start, let’s quickly...
Joy. Yes, that feeling you want, that everybody wants, but you never want to have to think about it. Let me be honest. When I read headlines that mention happiness or joy, I’m like “sure, but I have really important things to do like help people and run a business. That’s sweet that other...